Faltering Steps

Ever been given the bad end of a deal?

Ever feel that it is in your right to insist on the necessary services because you have already paid for them?

Some weeks before Easter this year, the Swallow's mate had had to travel to Malaysia on a work assignment.  Unlike past work travels, this time he had been given a room in a budget hotel.  Initially thought to be situated near her parents' home, the Swallow had been happy that her mate could consider dropping by sometime to say hello to them.

Upon her mate's arrival in Malaysia, he realized that he had been given the wrong location.  The hotel was much further away from her parents' home, although it was closer to the Swallow's sibling's home. "Not too bad", the Swallow had thought, "he just needs to be given a ride to dad and mom's place." She had been sure that her sibling and sibling-in-law would be willing to bring him back to the hotel on their way home, and she had not been disappointed.

Calling her from the hotel when he had finally checked in, her mate, with humour in his voice, had described the condition of the room.  There was ample evidence that the housekeeping team had not done a proper job in the toilet.   Sounds from pedestrians walking past the hotel (situated along a row of shophouses) easily travelled through the thin walls from the outside.  The Swallow was indignant.  How could her mate be given such a place to sleep in?  How was her mate going to get a good night's rest and be able to work well the next day?  Already missing her mate, she struggled to feel as cheerful as he was.

Many times that night, she asked her Lord for help to conquer the negative feelings within her.

The next day, the Swallow's mate managed to work in a visit to her parents' home.  Connecting over Skype during the visit, the Swallow and her young ones were able to chat with her mate and the rest of the family.  She quickly found out that her mother was having a fever, and her limbs were too weak for her to stand upright.  Two days later, in the early hours of a Thursday morning, the Swallow received a call from the sibling whose home was close to her parents'.  Her mother had woken up disoriented, and was not her normal self.  She needed urgent medical attention, but her sibling was unsure of what had to be done.  Praying for wisdom, the thought of her mate being at the hotel close to her siblings' home came.  The Swallow contacted her mate, and informed him of her sibling's call.  An arrangement was made for him to accompany her sibling-in-law to her parents' home, and thereafter to the hospital.  This would allow her sibling to stay at home with her young one.

When the call was disconnected, the Swallow was filled with a sense of shame.  How could she have forgotten?  Her Lord was and is always in control.  So many times He had proven Himself faithful and caring, yet because of a little discomfort (and not even suffered by her!), the Swallow had questioned...

The Swallow had thought her mate had been given the bad end of a deal.  She had felt that it was in his right to insist on good accommodation during his work travels.  But her Heavenly Master knew what would have been ahead of them.  If her mate had been housed in the usual hotel, it would have been difficult for him to give his support in the middle of the night.

Her mother stayed in the hospital for almost a week.  During the stay, the doctors had run many tests and although it was not until a week after her discharge that the doctors realized that she had dengue fever, they were able to diagnose other minor ailments which could be treated.  Just a day after her discharge, the Swallow and her family were also able to fly back for a quick surprise visit over the Easter weekend.  They could see how weak her mother was, but they were comforted that the Lord had made the way smooth for them to fly back for a visit, and even at a lower cost than anticipated.

Mark 4 : 35 - 41 (NIV)

That day when evening came, He said to his disciples, "Let us go over to the other side."  Leaving the crowd behind, they took Him along, just as He was, in the boat. There were also other boats with Him.  A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped. Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion. The disciples woke Him and said to Him, "Teacher, don't you care if we drown?"  He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, "Quiet! Be still!" Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.  He said to His disciples, "Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?"  They were terrified and asked each other, "Who is this? Even the wind and the waves obey Him!"

The Swallow is still learning to trust without wavering in her Heavenly Master.  With faltering steps of faith, the Swallow will continue to lean on His strength to accept graciously the little discomforts in life, and the unknowns in life.  Easier said than done, right?  She has failed so often....but she will press on - looking unto Jesus, the Author and Finisher of her faith.